Channeling Jennifer Aniston

Since I had to take a month off after our last IVF cycle due to doctor’s orders I thought it would be a great time to try to get back to some sort of exercise routine. As it is now obvious, I love to run, but I knew I needed to do something else as well. Running is great cardio, but doesn’t tone the body, or really make it stronger. I’ve had some friends start doing Pilates, and I was excited to learn that the gym I belong to started offering Pilates classes that use the machines (reformer) this month. Since my pottery class was a bust (I went twice out of five times due to other commitments, ie laying on the couch hung over on Sunday mornings, hence why I never posted any pictures of my work), I was nervous to sign up for these classes. But of course I did, and I LOVE it!

Reformer Pilates is a great way to tone the core of your body, but also firm up the arm and leg muscles. The idea is not to create big, bulky muscles, but lean, long, sinewy muscles, like Jennifer Aniston’s body. She is a huge Pilates believer, who is really the only celebrity I’d get tongue-tied over if I ever met her (I did kind of almost meet her once in Chicago when she was filming The Break Up, but I dorked out, and just stared at her). I am also excited for Pilates because I can keep doing it in pregnancy and a few friends said their post pregnancy bodies bounced back easily by doing Pilates.

The first class only two out of four people showed up, but it worked out great as I had no idea what I was doing. I’m surprised I didn’t smack myself in the face with one of the pulleys. I came to realize just how out of shape I have become. Things that looked fairly easy to the girl next to me, where difficult for me. Sit-ups were difficult for me. Coordination was difficult for me. Breathing was difficult for me. I was relieved when the other girl’s back started hurting and we ended a bit early. I think the instructor wasn’t sad to send me on my way either. But by the second class I had a new found confidence, and kept up with everyone else. I think my instructor was proud!

After losing Nicholas and shooting my body up with fertility drugs, I have put working out and exercising on the back burner. And rightfully so. I don’t regret that my body has become a different shape, or curvier in places I don’t think curves belong. But what does bother me is when my self-esteem is inhibited. Leaving these past few Pilates classes I have felt stronger, and like I can do anything I set my mind to. I haven’t had that feeling since the very first month that we started trying for a baby, which was over two years ago. I have my hopes pretty high for this IVF cycle, and that’s ok with me. I want to be excited again. I don’t want to feel numb to babies, or IVF or thoughts of children running around the house or in the backyard. Now talk to me after the transfer when I have bought out the local Walgreen’s of pregnancy tests, and my story may change. But for today I feel stronger and hopeful.