Pain in the Ass

Sorry for the swear word and to anyone that might offend. But my tush hurts. One might wonder how I got a pulled muscle of sorts in my rump. Well, I am embarrassed to say it's from my pottery class. Yes, I know. I am probably the only person who has suffered an injury while learning to throw pots on the wheel. This class was supposed to be a stress reliever, but it is starting to stress me out!

Yesterday, for class #2 (out of 5), everyone showed up to class right on time and we all just kind of looked towards the wheels. If you are trying to get a visual of the wheel, think of the famous scene from Ghost. Our regular instructor was no where to be seen, and we had a fill in named Dustin. To get a visual of Dustin, take every preconceived notion of what a male pottery instructor would be like, ball them up, and there you have Dustin.

After some instruction on how to knead the bubbles out of our clay, and purchasing a bucket and tools, Dustin showed us how to use the wheel. I was like a kid in a candy store, right up front to see everything so I could bring home the best bowl or vase ever made. Dustin showed us how to get the clay started on the wheel, water it down, mold it with our hands, water it down some more, speed up the wheel, wait, slow it down, stick a finger in the middle to create that whole bowl effect, keep your elbows on your knees, keep bent over directly over the clay. After 10 minutes of this, I was still clueless, and just sat down at a wheel to start. It looked so easy, I figured I'd have a couple of finished pots at the end of 3 hours.

It took me 3 minutes to realize I am nothing like Demi Moore at this new found hobby. It stresses me out. My perfect ball of clay looked like a potato that lost the fight. After 2.5 hours of trying my hand at throwing pots, well, I had one pathetic little “pot” if you want to call it that. It looks more like a toothbrush holder actually. I did make a pretty great looking bowl, but when I went to take it off the wheel the bottom of the bowl was left on the wheel. So the bowl then became another ball of clay.

I came home covered in clay, messy, stressed out. Last night as I was falling asleep, I had visions of the wheel, and how I could make my bowls and pots better. This morning I woke up with a pulled muscle in my bum. After trying to figure out what the heck I did, I showed Kevin how you have to sit when using the wheel, and bingo, wouldn’t you know it hurt like hell. I think I need to watch Ghost again this week.